Don’t Let These 10 Traits Cost You Your Friends
Find out what traits can make you lose your friends and how to improve them.
Do you ever feel like you have trouble maintaining friendships?
Do you wonder why people seem to drift away from you, or avoid spending time with you?
Do you wish you could have more meaningful and lasting relationships with others?
If you answered yes to any of these questions, then this article is for you.
You see, sometimes we unknowingly develop habits or behaviors that can push people away, or make them lose interest in us. These traits can damage our social life, and even affect our mental health and happiness.
But don’t worry, there is hope.
You can change these traits, and improve your social skills, if you are willing to learn and practice.
In this article, we will reveal the 10 most common traits that make friends away, and how to overcome them.
By the end of this article, you will have a better understanding of yourself, and how to be a better friend to others.
So, let’s get started.
Trait #1: Being Negative
One of the most common traits that make friends away is being negative.
This means that you always focus on the bad side of things, complain a lot, criticize others, or express pessimism. You may think that you are just being realistic, or venting your frustrations, but to others, you may come across as a downer, a whiner, or a drag.
Think about it.
Would you like to spend time with someone who always makes you feel sad, angry, or hopeless?
Probably not.
Neither would your friends.
People generally prefer to be around positive, optimistic, and cheerful people, who make them feel good, inspired, or hopeful.
That doesn’t mean that you have to fake happiness, or ignore your problems.
It just means that you have to balance your negative thoughts and emotions with positive ones, and learn to cope with them in a healthy way.
For example, you can:
- Practice gratitude. Every day, write down three things that you are thankful for, or that make you happy. This will help you appreciate what you have, and shift your focus from the negative to the positive.
- Seek solutions. Instead of dwelling on your problems, or blaming others, try to find ways to solve them, or improve your situation. This will help you feel more empowered, and less helpless.
- Avoid comparisons. Instead of comparing yourself to others, or feeling jealous or inferior, focus on your own strengths, achievements, and goals. This will help you boost your self-esteem, and reduce your insecurity.
- Seek support. Instead of isolating yourself, or burdening your friends with your negativity, reach out to someone who can help you, such as a therapist, a counselor, or a mentor. This will help you deal with your issues, and get professional advice.
- Be optimistic. Instead of expecting the worst, or giving up, try to look at the bright side, or hope for the best. This will help you cope with uncertainty, and overcome challenges.
By being more positive, you will not only improve your mood, but also your relationships.
You will attract more friends, who will enjoy your company, and support you. You will also be a better friend, who will encourage, compliment, and uplift others.
Trait #2: Being Selfish
Another common trait that makes friends away is being selfish.
This means that you only care about yourself, your needs, your interests, or your opinions. You may think that you are just being independent, or assertive, but to others, you may come across as a jerk, a snob, or a bore.
Think about it.
Would you like to spend time with someone who always puts themselves first, ignores your feelings, or dominates the conversation?
Probably not.
Neither would your friends.
People generally prefer to be around generous, caring, and attentive people, who make them feel valued, respected, and appreciated.
That doesn’t mean that you have to sacrifice yourself, or please others.
It just means that you have to consider others, and their perspectives, and learn to compromise and cooperate.
For example, you can:
- Share. Instead of hoarding your resources, or taking more than you need, try to share what you have, or offer to help others. This will help you show kindness, and generosity.
- Listen. Instead of talking too much, or interrupting others, try to listen more, or ask questions. This will help you show interest, and curiosity.
- Empathize. Instead of judging others, or dismissing their feelings, try to understand them, or put yourself in their shoes. This will help you show compassion, and sympathy.
- Respect. Instead of imposing your views, or criticizing others, try to respect their opinions, or agree to disagree. This will help you show tolerance, and acceptance.
- Reciprocate. Instead of expecting others to do everything for you, or taking them for granted, try to do something for them, or show your appreciation. This will help you show gratitude, and recognition.
By being more selfless, you will not only improve your character, but also your relationships.
You will make more friends, who will trust you, and respect you. You will also be a better friend, who will support, help, and thank others.
Trait #3: Being Dishonest
A third common trait that makes friends away is being dishonest.
This means that you lie, cheat, steal, or betray others. You may think that you are just being smart, or protecting yourself, but to others, you may come across as a liar, a cheater, or a traitor.
Think about it.
Would you like to spend time with someone who always deceives you, takes advantage of you, or hurts you?
Probably not.
Neither would your friends.
People generally prefer to be around honest, loyal, and trustworthy people, who make them feel safe, secure, and confident.
That doesn’t mean that you have to tell the truth all the time, or expose yourself.
It just means that you have to be truthful, faithful, and reliable, and learn to respect and honor your commitments.
For example, you can:
- Be sincere. Instead of lying, or making up stories, try to tell the truth, or admit your mistakes. This will help you show integrity, and humility.
- Be loyal. Instead of cheating, or flirting with others, try to be faithful, or respect your partner. This will help you show fidelity, and devotion.
- Be trustworthy. Instead of stealing, or taking what is not yours, try to be honest, or return what you borrow. This will help you show respect, and responsibility.
- Be respectful. Instead of betraying, or gossiping about others, try to be loyal, or keep their secrets. This will help you show loyalty, and discretion.
- Be reliable. Instead of breaking your promises, or letting others down, try to keep your word, or follow through. This will help you show dependability, and accountability.
By being more honest, you will not only improve your reputation, but also your relationships.
You will keep more friends, who will believe you, and confide in you. You will also be a better friend, who will defend, protect, and honor others.
Trait #4: Being Boring
A fourth common trait that makes friends away is being boring.
This means that you have no hobbies, interests, or passions, or that you never try new things, or have fun. You may think that you are just being practical, or focused, but to others, you may come across as a dull, bland, or uninteresting person.
Think about it.
Would you like to spend time with someone who always does the same thing, or has nothing to talk about?
Probably not.
Neither would your friends.
People generally prefer to be around interesting, adventurous, and fun people, who make them feel excited, curious, and entertained.
That doesn’t mean that you have to be a thrill-seeker, or a party animal.
It just means that you have to expand your horizons, and your personality, and learn to enjoy life and have fun.
For example, you can:
- Explore. Instead of staying in your comfort zone, or sticking to your routine, try to discover new places, or experience new things. This will help you broaden your perspective, and enrich your life.
- Learn. Instead of being ignorant, or closed-minded, try to learn new skills, or acquire new knowledge. This will help you improve yourself, and increase your intelligence.
- Express. Instead of being shy, or reserved, try to express your opinions, or share your feelings. This will help you communicate better, and connect with others.
- Create. Instead of being passive, or unproductive, try to create something, or pursue your passion. This will help you unleash your potential, and showcase your talent.
- Have fun. Instead of being serious, or stressed, try to have fun, or relax. This will help you enjoy yourself, and reduce your tension.
By being more interesting, you will not only improve your mood, but also your relationships.
You will impress more friends, who will admire you, and learn from you. You will also be a better friend, who will surprise, delight, and entertain others.
Trait #5: Being Insecure
A fifth common trait that makes friends away is being insecure.
This means that you have low self-esteem, confidence, or worth, or that you constantly seek validation, approval, or attention from others. You may think that you are just being humble, or realistic, but to others, you may come across as a needy, clingy, or desperate person.
Think about it.
Would you like to spend time with someone who always doubts themselves, or puts themselves down?
Probably not.
Neither would your friends.
People generally prefer to be around secure, confident, and self-assured people, who make them feel comfortable, respected, and appreciated.
That doesn’t mean that you have to agree with everything, or accept everyone.
It just means that you have to overcome your insecurity, and your jealousy, and learn to be happy for others, and yourself.
For example, you can:
- Be confident. Instead of being insecure, or seeking validation, try to be confident, or trust yourself. This will help you show self-esteem, and self-reliance.
- Be busy. Instead of being idle, or bored, try to be busy, or find something to do. This will help you show productivity, and interest.
- Be social. Instead of being isolated, or clingy, try to be social, or make new friends. This will help you show sociability, and diversity.
- Be respectful. Instead of being intrusive, or demanding, try to be respectful, or ask for permission. This will help you show courtesy, and consideration.
- Be flexible. Instead of being possessive, or jealous, try to be flexible, or give some space. This will help you show generosity, and freedom.
By being more secure, you will not only improve your self-image, but also your relationships.
You will impress more friends, who will admire you, and respect you. You will also be a better friend, who will care, compliment, and validate others.
Trait #6: Being Jealous
A sixth common trait that makes friends away is being jealous.
This means that you feel envious, resentful, or bitter towards others, or that you perceive them as a threat, or a rival. You may think that you are just being competitive, or protective, but to others, you may come across as a green-eyed monster, a troublemaker, or a hater.
Think about it.
Would you like to spend time with someone who always covets what you have, or tries to sabotage your success?
Probably not.
Neither would your friends.
People generally prefer to be around happy, supportive, and friendly people, who make them feel proud, motivated, and celebrated.
That doesn’t mean that you have to be indifferent, or complacent.
It just means that you have to overcome your jealousy, and your insecurity, and learn to be happy for others, and yourself.
For example, you can:
- Congratulate. Instead of being bitter, or ignoring others’ achievements, try to congratulate them, or compliment them. This will help you show admiration, and appreciation.
- Learn. Instead of being envious, or copying others’ strategies, try to learn from them, or ask for their advice. This will help you show respect, and curiosity.
- Collaborate. Instead of being competitive, or undermining others’ efforts, try to collaborate with them, or support their goals. This will help you show cooperation, and generosity.
- Celebrate. Instead of being resentful, or downplaying others’ happiness, try to celebrate with them, or share their joy. This will help you show enthusiasm, and friendship.
- Improve. Instead of being insecure, or comparing yourself to others, try to improve yourself, or focus on your own growth. This will help you show confidence, and ambition.
By being less jealous, you will not only improve your attitude, but also your relationships.
You will inspire more friends, who will respect you, and admire you. You will also be a better friend, who will cheer, encourage, and congratulate others.
Trait #7: Being Judgmental
A seventh common trait that makes friends away is being judgmental.
This means that you have a rigid, narrow, or biased view of others, or that you criticize, mock, or reject them based on their appearance, behavior, or beliefs. You may think that you are just being honest, or principled, but to others, you may come across as a snob, a bully, or a bigot.
Think about it.
Would you like to spend time with someone who always looks down on you, or makes fun of you?
Probably not.
Neither would your friends.
People generally prefer to be around open-minded, tolerant, and accepting people, who make them feel comfortable, respected, and appreciated.
That doesn’t mean that you have to agree with everything, or accept everyone.
It just means that you have to be more flexible, understanding, and respectful, and learn to appreciate diversity, and differences.
For example, you can:
- Observe. Instead of jumping to conclusions, or making assumptions, try to observe others, or gather more information. This will help you show curiosity, and awareness.
- Understand. Instead of dismissing others, or labeling them, try to understand them, or see their point of view. This will help you show empathy, and compassion.
- Respect. Instead of criticizing others, or imposing your standards, try to respect them, or acknowledge their choices. This will help you show tolerance, and acceptance.
- Appreciate. Instead of mocking others, or making fun of them, try to appreciate them, or find something positive. This will help you show admiration, and recognition.
- Be humble. Instead of being arrogant, or thinking that you are better than others, try to be humble, or admit your flaws. This will help you show modesty, and humility.
By being less judgmental, you will not only improve your perspective, but also your relationships.
You will welcome more friends, who will feel comfortable, and accepted by you. You will also be a better friend, who will respect, appreciate, and admire others.
Trait #8: Being Clingy
An eighth common trait that makes friends away is being clingy.
This means that you are too dependent, needy, or attached to others, or that you demand too much attention, time, or affection from them. You may think that you are just being friendly, or caring, but to others, you may come across as a burden, a nuisance, or a stalker.
Think about it.
Would you like to spend time with someone who always follows you around, or invades your privacy?
Probably not.
Neither would your friends.
People generally prefer to be around independent, self-reliant, and balanced people, who make them feel free, relaxed, and comfortable.
That doesn’t mean that you have to be alone, or distant.
It just means that you have to be more independent, self-reliant, and balanced, and learn to respect others’ boundaries, and space.
For example, you can:
- Be confident. Instead of being insecure, or seeking validation, try to be confident, or trust yourself. This will help you show self-esteem, and self-reliance.
- Be busy. Instead of being idle, or bored, try to be busy, or find something to do. This will help you show productivity, and interest.
- Be social. Instead of being isolated, or clingy, try to be social, or make new friends. This will help you show sociability, and diversity.
- Be respectful. Instead of being intrusive, or demanding, try to be respectful, or ask for permission. This will help you show courtesy, and consideration.
- Be flexible. Instead of being possessive, or jealous, try to be flexible, or give some space. This will help you show generosity, and freedom.
By being less clingy, you will not only improve your independence, but also your relationships.
You will attract more friends, who will enjoy your company, and respect your space. You will also be a better friend, who will trust, support, and give freedom to others.
Trait #9: Being Rude
A ninth common trait that makes friends away is being rude.
This means that you are impolite, disrespectful, or offensive to others, or that you ignore, interrupt, or insult them. You may think that you are just being direct, or funny, but to others, you may come across as a jerk, a meanie, or a jerk.
Think about it.
Would you like to spend time with someone who always hurts your feelings, or disrespects you?
Probably not.
Neither would your friends.
People generally prefer to be around polite, respectful, and kind people, who make them feel good, valued, and appreciated.
That doesn’t mean that you have to be fake, or boring.
It just means that you have to be more polite, respectful, and kind, and learn to communicate better, and avoid conflicts.
For example, you can:
- Be polite. Instead of being impolite, or rude, try to be polite, or use good manners. This will help you show courtesy, and civility.
- Be respectful. Instead of being disrespectful, or offensive, try to be respectful, or use appropriate language. This will help you show consideration, and decency.
- Be kind. Instead of being unkind, or mean, try to be kind, or use nice words. This will help you show compassion, and friendliness.
- Be attentive. Instead of ignoring others, or not paying attention, try to be attentive, or listen carefully. This will help you show interest, and curiosity.
- Be assertive. Instead of interrupting others, or being aggressive, try to be assertive, or express yourself calmly. This will help you show confidence, and respect.
By being less rude, you will not only improve your manners, but also your relationships.
You will please more friends, who will like you, and value you. You will also be a better friend, who will compliment, listen, and respect others.
Trait #10: Being Unreliable
A tenth common trait that makes friends away is being unreliable.
This means that you are not dependable, trustworthy, or consistent, or that you break your promises, cancel your plans, or change your mind. You may think that you are just being flexible, or spontaneous, but to others, you may come across as a flake, a liar, or a quitter.
Think about it.
Would you like to spend time with someone who always lets you down, or disappoints you?
Probably not.
Neither would your friends.
People generally prefer to be around reliable, trustworthy, and consistent people, who make them feel secure, confident, and satisfied.
That doesn’t mean that you have to be rigid, or boring.
It just means that you have to be more reliable, trustworthy, and consistent, and learn to keep your word, follow through, and stick to your goals.
For example, you can:
- Be honest. Instead of lying, or making excuses, try to be honest, or admit your mistakes. This will help you show integrity, and humility.
- Be committed. Instead of breaking your promises, or backing out, try to keep your promises, or honor your commitments. This will help you show loyalty, and responsibility.
- Be punctual. Instead of being late, or not showing up, try to be punctual, or arrive on time. This will help you show respect, and professionalism.
- Be consistent. Instead of changing your mind, or being unpredictable, try to be consistent, or stick to your decisions. This will help you show stability, and reliability.
- Be persistent. Instead of giving up, or quitting, try to be persistent, or persevere.